


The Manifesto on how to be Perfect

by Laura_cant



Category: 1D - Fandom, Derrygirls, Funny - Fandom, Harry Styles - Fandom, Humor - Fandom, Humour - Fandom, IT, Memes - Fandom, One Direction, TikTok - Fandom, anime - Fandom, brooklyn 99, bts
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-14
Updated: 2020-05-14
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:07:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 498
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24183385
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Laura_cant/pseuds/Laura_cant
Summary: You ever seen all those stupid Instagram models doing their 'daily routine' and they work out like a gazillion times, eat healthy and do work while SMILING. Living the perfect life, being the perfect person.Meanwhile us non-psychopath people are in bed eating crisps and watching Netflix. Yeah, well I wondered if I could really do it. Be perfect I mean. So, here goes nothing...
Comments: 1
Kudos: 5





	The Manifesto on how to be Perfect

Right so it's week nine of lockdown and, safe to say I am losing it. I read this book ages ago called The Manifesto on How to be Interesting where this girl Bree (absolute bitch in my humble opinion) basically dumped all her friends and wore a load of makeup so she could be popular (because popular= interesting). Seriously though, it was a really good book like I loved it, just Bree was NOT a likeable person.   
But, it gave me the idea to do this because I mean why not? Basically, I'm going to try to live a 'perfect' life for a month or so, I'm not sure, I haven't really set the rules yet. But point is I'm going to be eXACTLY like those models that do work out routines and what-I-eat-in-a-day videos. Or at least I'll try. Just so you know though, I am starting completely from scratch. I literally have not done any exercise since lockdown started except 30 minute walks when my parents force me too. And the furthest I go with 'healthy eating' is like, a smoothie every once in a while. My diet consists mainly of wotsits, grilled cheese, cereal and chocolate. I really don't know how I'm not morbidly obese yet.  
It's not just going to be eating healthy and doing exercise though, there are mULTIPLE other things I want to get done so here they are:  
-start waking up early each morning (this is a task I do not find in the least simple)  
-do couch to 5k (because it's for fat old people, how old could it be)  
-drink loads of water (to get clear skin, mine is currently a MESS)  
-actually do schoolwork (I know, why???)  
-learn how to do good handstands, cartwheels and maybe if I'm feeling super cool a backflip  
-actually wear nice outfits instead of looking like a slob  
-clear out and redecorate my bedroom (it looks like a five year old American lives here)   
-get nice pictures of myself??? This might not be humanly possible but I can try  
-don't sit on my phone all day  
-figure out what the heck I'm gonna do with my life regarding uni, a job etc. (I'm only 15 but whatever)  
-become a sexy beast  
Ok, I think that's kind of it, but ITS ALOT FOR ME. I am basically the word lazy personified.  
So I'll be updating every day starting, um soon? But I'm waiting to have my period so I can start on a ~clean slate~. I don't want to be doing workouts with cramps because I'm not like, superhuman.  
Also, I'm going to be eating no junk food at allll during this so obviously I'm not doing that without any incentive. On the last day of June (if I'm not found with a toaster in my bath by then) I'm ordering myself a pizza, loads of ice cream and cookies. Because I deserve it.  
So yeah, um read if you want to I guess?


End file.
